For the Christian today's entertainment world, in particular, modern music offers many real dilemmas. Over the past 35 years the face of modern music has changed drastically. In fact, I often remark that nearly the only constant remaining is that musicians still play instruments and stand on stages. The lyrics, lifestyle and images of modern rock and pop music have without doubt gotten progressively darker. Still the question just won't go away. What is a believer to do?
Even mature Christians are feeling the strain to bend to a culture gone mad morally. There is constant pressure for us (and our kids) to "let down our hair, have a little fun and go with the flow." The world system, our natural fallen flesh and the demonic "fiery darts" continue to bombard us from all sides yet we are directed by God's Word to "stand firm." Yet in a practical sense to make this stand we must answer some questions. What is acceptable for us? Can some music or movies actually cause us harm? What are we to do if our homes are under the influence or attack of "worldly" entertainment?
How do we maintain a righteous and Biblical standard for what we see and hear and yet not close ourselves off from a lost and dying world thus isolating them from the only hope they've got - Jesus? What perimeters do we employ to avoid being either too liberal or too legalistic with our families and ourselves in regards to today's entertainment? Considering the tremendous peer-pressure which they are subjected to, how can we keep in touch with our children and teens, communicating God's truth and our concerns, yet allowing them (and the Holy Spirit) room to operate?
Before we can answer these and other pertinent questions we must have an understanding of just what we are dealing with. In this first of two parts we'll look into a few of the problems which the modern music scene offers to Bible believers.
"See to it that no one takes you captive through hollow and deceptive philosophy, which depends on human tradition and the basic principles of this world rather than on Christ." Colossians 2:8 (NIV)
The ever-changing world of modern music continues to be a stronghold of controversy. In recent months headlines of shocking vulgarity, occult involvement and even songs allegedly inducing suicide have commanded the attention of the press. Keep in mind that today's musicians are the role models to our youth. Gone are the days of Captain Kangaroo and Roy Rogers - in are names such as George Michael, Paula Abdul, The New Kids on the Block, Slaughter, Guns N' Roses, Bon Jovi and Def Leppard.
The musicians of today may indeed be shaping our youth as no other force ever reckoned with. In fact, one study of the lives of 1800 Canadian youth 13-18 years old found that rock music was second in importance only to friends.1 Tragically, the poll found that parents were sixth and God was sixteenth.
Our kids may attempt to tell us that they never hear the lyrics of the songs and are uninfluenced by the lifestyles presented. However, this is simply a ruse from the enemy. We can ill afford to allow our youth's flesh or immaturity to dictate what is accepted or allowed in our homes. Philosophically, much of what is being presented by todays rock heroes falls dramatically short of what is acceptable before God. Remember that listening is a choice. No one has a gun to our heads forcing us to participate.
If we are have a proper perspective in understanding today's music and how Christians must respond to it we must examine the lifestyles and the lyrics which are being presented. If you've lost touch with this influential force in our children lives here are just a few examples to update you on what is happening in music today.
A few years ago we watched as a record store owner was convicted of breaking the Florida obscenity code for selling the album As "Nasty as They Want To Be" by the rap group 2 Live Crew to an 11 year old girl. The lyrics contained in this 3 + million selling album (even some of the song titles) are unpublishable here.
Not to be topped by 2 Live Crew, pop seductress Madonna released the video "Justify My Love" in November 1990 only to have rock video cable vendors MTV and VH-1 refuse to air it. The video portrays two women (Madonna herself one of them) and a man engaging in voyeurism, group sex, cross-dressing, bisexuality, and S&M. Madonna tried justifying the video's portrayal in USA Today by stating that she was merely presenting "fantasies (which) exist in all human beings." She stated, "this issue is not taboo in the movies. I want people to deal with it; I want people to see it." (USA Today November 29, 1990, p.1D) Her core audience are 12-18 year-olds.
Rock giants Poison confess to bringing a computer listing of their numerous groupie with them on tour. Each name is cross-referenced as to name, city, color of hair and the type of sexual activities which they do best! (Rolling Stone, Dec. 15, 1988)
Grammy winner M.C. Hammer claims to be a Christian on the liner notes of his hit album yet sings "Soft and wet, that's how we like íem. Yo, baby tell me what's your name. I donít mean no disrespect but tell me girl are you soft and wet? . . . Soft and sexy, you got it that way. Wet is what happens when we both start to play. Good, she is. I should know. I like the feeling when my nature starts to grow. I feel the thrill of a spin at the wheel. I hit the lottery when she says, "I will." I love it when you're just soft and wet. Get wet baby."
British metal monsters Judas Priest were recently acquitted of charges that one of their earlier albums included messages which induced two Nevada youths to commit suicide through subliminal suggestion. Judas Priest is free to perform but the two young men, one of which testified against Priest (via tape) before his death, are not. Noted for their sadomasochistic attire and lyrics of violence and hate their defense lawyer called them "God fearing, family oriented musicians."
Please understand that we must maintain a balance, not going off on a "demon hunt." Certainly not every song on the radio says "worship the devil" or "shoot your mother." Not every video incorporates images of drug use or suicide. Satan is much more crafty than that. If every modern song held such values very few people would ever watch or listen and certainly rock music would never have grown to it's place as the single most powerful form of entertainment in history. At the same token should the mildest video being currently aired have been played over network television in 1955 it would shocked even the non-Christians (who had not been desensitized by the last 35 years of moral decline) right out of their socks!
As dark as it may seem there is hope. If your children or grandchildren are being adversely affected by rock music or other ungodly entertainment I encourage you not to give up. Stay strong in your commitment to lovingly pray them through. If God can save and deliver me from where I once was as a flesh-dictated drug abuser there is hope for any situation.
Dealing with Music in the Christian Home
What's a parent to do?
For the past 10 years parents, teens and children have attended our "Where Do You Stand?" seminar/crusades across North America asking the same questions. Over and over I have looked into the eyes of a distraught parent at wits end over the controversy of music in the Christian home. My purpose here is to give you some practical answers which can be applied to help bring balance and Biblical sanity back to your home.
First - Pray
To many it may be viewed as a mere placebo but prayer is the most crucial, vital and powerful tool which any Christian can utilize. The hand of God moves when we pray. It shouldn't be the last thing we do when all of our human efforts have failed. Instead, it must be our starting point and the thing by which all human actions are directed from. God's Word promises in Isaiah 43:19 that he will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert. That's the God we serve. Nothing is impossible with Him. He didn't forget me through years of drugs, alcohol, adultery and New Age beliefs. It was the prayers of a loving Grandmother and wife that changed me. God hasn't forgotten you, your children, your grandchildren and your situation. Whether your dilemma is about music, money, health or relationships, the hand of God is moved by the Christian who petitions Him constantly. It is regular, fervent, positive, Scriptural prayers which bring results. We must posture ourselves in a position to do spiritual warfare - not in a mind-set of defeated "woe-fare." Many of us resort to God only in times of distress or need. However, I believe that we need to pray for our children even if they are doing just fine. We must war for the minds, bodies and spirits of those who have been or may be affected adversely by today entertainment. A great time to start praying for your kids is before they are born. If you are interested in seeing real progress made in the lives of others you must decide to get serious about prayer.
Second - Get Knowledge and Understanding
We will never win the war over music with our children by marching into their rooms and declaring to them that "rock music is of the Devil." Though technically much of today's music may satanically inspired, that in itself is a surface clichÈ that will evoke feelings that you are attacking or invading their domain. Generalizing, or acting out of feelings or personal taste can defeat our purpose. Our goal should be to bring our kids closer to Jesus and His principles - not simply to rid our homes of music which we do not like or understand. If we don't have concrete facts to back up our inklings will may well close the door permanently to all dialog about music. Before diving in, know about what you speak. To condemn without facts, documentation and knowledge is futile. There are many fine resources available to help you get a grip on the modern music and entertainment scene. At the risk of sounding self-promoting my book From Rock To Rock details 1650 groups and artists. We would be glad to assist you with video and audio tapes on music, media, cartoons and toys, New Age, Satanism and other pertinent topics. Whatever you do get armed with information before trying to converse with your children about their entertainment.
Third - Take a Survey of Their Music
I know someone reading this is thinking, "God forbid Eric. Do you mean that I should actually go into their rooms and listen to their music?" That is exactly what I am saying. I don't mean for you to invade their privacy but you should ask them questions such as "Who is this group? What do these lyrics mean to you? Who is this in the poster on your wall?" You may not be able to understand the lyrics but I guarantee your kids do. By asking to see and hear their tapes and compact disks not only will you get a scope of the intensity of the music problem in their lives but you will send the message to them that you care about who they care about - their heroes, the musicians.
Forth - Ask Questions that Identify the Music's Impact Beyond Entertainment
Here are just a few to get you started.
- If your children have received Christ ask them what they are feeding His temple, their bodies (I Corinthians 3:16, II Corinthians 6:16).
- "Do the groups and singers you listen to glorify God?"
- "Can you readily tell if Jesus is the Lord over the lives of the musicians?"
- "Are your favorite musicians building or destroying the Kingdom of God?" (It's one or the other.)
- "Are they serving themselves or the living God?"
- "Would the Lord listen to this?"
Fifth - Take Compassion
You are dealing with an extremely influential even addictive area in many lives. Love them through the maze of today's entertainment as the Holy Spirit directs you.
Sixth - Provide a Biblically Based Christian Music Alternative
Space limitations do not allow me to help you with guidelines for choosing what Christian music may be appropriate for your children or teens. But there is some great music being produced today that will speak the message of faith and truth to our kids. Keep in mind that we all need music.
Seventh - Outline Biblical Concepts
A few Scriptures that can be related to what we accept mentally, spiritually and physically into our homes are:
Colossians 2:8, Ephesians 5:1-7, Deuteronomy 7:25-26, Acts 19:18-20, Isaiah 33:14-17 (Amplified Bible), Philippians 4:8, II Corinthians 6:14-7:1
Our goal should be to teach the children and teens to make good Biblically based decisions. We can only do so much. We can only be with them for a limited time each day. If it be their will to get the wrong music and entertainment they'll get it somewhere unless their hearts and wills are turned toward Heaven. It is our basic responsibility as parents to point them in the right direction (Proverbs 22:6).
If, after following these seven steps which may take days or weeks to complete, there is still no progress concerning unbiblical music in your home, it is time for further action. Many parents are afraid to do what I am about to tell you but we run the risk of being an "Eli" if we do not. (Read I Samuel chapter 2 to find out what happened when a father refused to discipline his son's for sinful activity.)
There may come a time where a parent simply must physically act against a child or teen's will to carry out Joshua 24 verse 15 - "As for me and my house we are going to serve the Lord." If after you have lovingly and Biblically talked and prayed there is still no change, I advise you to actually remove any materials that are unscriptural in content. We must hold to God's standards and return to holiness in our homes, sacrificing even the cost of short term household peace to do so. The long range price is too great to pay! God does not honor sin, rebellion, occultism, violence, substance abuse and other themes prevalent in today's rock, rap, pop, and yes parents, even country music. Our families and us have no excuse before God based on what everybody else is doing or listening to. If we want to see our family's musical choices change our first step should be to examine our own listening habits
God is speaking to us about cleaning up our lives, homes and churches. His standard remains constant regardless of the immoral condition of our society. Ephesians 5 instructs us that we are to have no "hint" of sexual immorality around us. Our concern must be to seek and please God through obedience. Don't let anything destroy your "sincere and pure devotion to Christ" (II Corinthians 11:3). II Peter 2:19 warns us that if something or someone takes us captive by such influence we are brought into bondage. If are homes are to be a refuge of God's peace and love it may take a time of struggle and unrest to bring about order and restore joy and real happiness.
No one said it would be easy to live the Christian life. It takes effort, but it is well worth it! As Paul encouraged the Ephesians not join in partnership with evil men I leave you with the same advise. In loving strength we must teach our children the difference between what is right and what is wrong, (Ezekiel 44:23) helping them to distinguish the will of God. We must focus their eyes on The Rock.
Copyright 1994, Eric Barger
You may reach Eric Barger's ministry at www.ericbarger.com
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